Pro-Actively waiting for the BFP to arrive

Fertility treatments can be very stressful because so much is at stake. As we realize that we might need to get pregnant with the help of treatments, we tend to think that something is wrong with us. The word “broken” often comes to mind and we get to feel very low about our abilities to achieve our life dream goal.

As a Coach and as someone who went through many years of infertility treatments, I know how important it is to stay inspired and positive through the process. We have no control over this process and when it will result in a positive pregnancy. This puts us in a position of waiting. How can we pro-actively wait? With the right tools we can turn this time to be one of extreme value to our personal growth. These tools can also help in the way we “show up” for our partners and future kids in our day-to-day life.

Here are some points on how to Pro-Actively wait during the time of infertility treatments and/or while waiting for adoption or a Gestational Carrier/Surrogate:

Infertility treatments can be a lonely place

Infertility is a strange thing.  So many people are affected by it, yet no two journeys are the same.

As a fertility coach that went through six years of infertility treatments, I can relate to the emotional impact it has on the life of everyone going through the process. I remember the first steps in this journey, the uncertainty, the fear, the stress and mostly the long lonely hours that come with the process.

We are raised to believe that when we work hard and put our best efforts into a task, chances are that we will succeed in achieving it. Such a belief systems doesn’t work when it comes to infertility treatments. All the brave women that have been through this process have done their BEST and placed all their efforts into the process, yet no one could promise them that it will work.

Staying Open

I often asked myself when is enough, enough? Having been through many years of infertility treatments, being up there with all the emotions that come with the process, getting pregnant, strong medical suggestions to terminate it at 18 weeks, 17 egg donors embryos that never created a pregnancy, I again found myself asking this question, when is enough, enough?

This race to getting pregnant for me and many other woman can at times be very stressful and place us in the need to be in control, to know that we are doing all that we can and wake up day after day ready to fight the infertility battle. 

Relinquishing worry – Another gift of Infertility

Relinquishing worry

Waiting teaches us to dwell fully where we are. When we don’t control our circumstances and we can’t predict the future, we have the opportunity to live in the present.  From the book Seven Spiritual Gifts of Waiting.

We all have experienced the stress that is involved while trying to conceive; yet we also have experienced the hope that comes when we are ready to start our journey of infertility treatments. This is the time when I learned that I can let go of trying to “fix” a situation and finally get help for something I couldn’t figure out on my own… 

The Power of Intention – Inviting your unborn baby

We all know that IVF treatments are extremely stressful. They put us in a vulnerable space with lots of emotions coming up as a result.  However, I must say that after a few IVF cycles I realized the first gift that came to me as a result.

That gift was hope.

The main difference between times that I was in a cycle and the times I wasn’t – was the ability to experience hope.

Having hope is such a big factor in everybody’s life. Without hope, life can get really hard. Hope gave me the strength to fully show up for my process. It made the difference between being positive and being scared, sad, stressed and negative.